Anger and Loathing and the 2016 election

Yesterday I woke up at 4:30 and went to the polls to work to make sure that all my fellow citizens (that I could affect) got a change to exercise their vote. I returned home around 10pm.  I was tired, and after glancing over the results tapes from my 11 voting machines... I was discouraged.  I didn't want Trump to Win...

As of this moment, it seems as though he has.

Inspite of

Sexism,
An active Child Rape case,
Consumer Fraud,
Bankruptcies,
and other scandals...

And I am angry.  I am angry that I processed hundreds of voters yesterday and while some of them were just a-holes toward me, most of them smiled in my face, called me sweet-heart and voted against my best interest. I know that's reaching to expect any empathy, but it does get under my skin.  What I am really angry about though is that I know that countless people, many on my "Facebook friends list" and those who have "befriended" me in real life, voted against my best interest.  I am most upset because the candidate, who would at least preserve my best interest ... for at least 4 years lost... and I don't just feel uncomfortable... (I was uncomfortable with Bush 43, and then voted for him for his second term).... no, I am distraught.

And just in case I haven't spelled it out yet, here is how I feel.

I am a:

Black (The exhausting task of being black in America)

Christian Woman (Here's why these Christian Women Don't want to Live IN Donald Trump's America)

From a family from the South (Growing up Jim Crow)

Who were depressed and depressive. (Racism Breeds Depression and Other Problems)

Due to Institutional racism and Jim Crow Laws.  (Institutional Racism is our Way of Life)

And living in a world where black children are programmed to go straight to prison (Dismantling the School to Prison Pipeline)

I have friends, loved ones, and relatives who are LGBT (and/or) Q.  (Christian Parents of LGBTQ Children: The Church has been Wrong)

I am the wife of a black business executive. (Black in Corporate America & So Very Tired)

My birth father is an Immigrant, My beloved Dad (stepdad) is the son of an Immigrant, my husband, the father of my children is an immigrant.  (Trump is against legal immigration too)

I am the proud mother of a young black man (Fact Sheet: Outcomes for Young, Black Men)

And a young black women.  (Black, Poor, and Woman in Higher Education: What I Learned from Graduate School)

This is sum of who I am.

This is my legacy... and in a Trump Presidency, I feel like any ground we have made up under President Obama will be lost... socially, at the very least.  And that makes me sad, and angry, and ... stabby.

... and if you cannot relate in a tangible way to any of these issues, you ARE truly privileged, and you probably have no problems with a Trump Presidency.

Don't think I don't understand why you have voted for Trump or for 3rd party. I get it. Hillary was flawed, and like it or not, was attached to her husbands flawed legacy.  There is no way a mere woman who stood for the rights of other marginalized groups could win against a white man... any white man, ever, period.

I think white women have just learned something that all black people taught their children when I was growing up.  It made us kids so angry and we actually rejected this teaching until it was too late. It is this... Black people have to work twice as hard to get half as much.  (Black workers really do need to be twice as good.)  White women, are in the same boat. We all know that President Obama won because he was beyond reproach.  His Leadership and Character Traits were not mouth service.  He was the real thing. To have any candidate for president we need people who are pretty much sainted.  Because if this Moron of an orange human (yes, I said that) can win over experience and diplomacy, we have to admit that the deck is stacked and a penis and skin color and money trumps experience, and positivity, any day, every day.

This is my world... I understand it, but I don't have to like it, and I sure as hell don't need to pray for this presidency.  It is not a sin to pray against something... Christians have been praying against abortion for ages... so....  I am praying for protection of the under represented and the underdogs... so deal with it. Because here is the thing.  I abhor this guy.  He has fueled racism in an ugly, terrible way.  Tell yourself whatever you must.  Blame it on Obama if you will... but this man is a very, very bad man, with very bad ideas. The people from his deplorable contingent is calling him a "God" and a "King".  He is dangerous and I will not get behind him.  I will not.

So please forgive my anger and loathing this morning. But my daughter called me last night with trembling in her voice... so much that I thought she'd been in a car accident.  MY son is in disbelief right now... so maybe your non-ethnic status quo is protected for four more years, but mine is in danger.  Enjoy this. Good luck with that.

But there's always some lemonade to be made from these freaking bitter lemons.
My daughter told me last night that she is now a political activist.  We can't fight this stacked deck by just voting. We need to get out and participate.  We must act.  I am now a political activist too.  I just need a moment to find out where exactly I stand and how I will proceed.

Oh, and to anyone who thinks a Trump Presidency will bring some kind of white utopia and he will give back in any way???  You've been scammed.  Trump is all about himself and no one else.