Not Another Homeschool Blog

As 2016 draws to a close,  I sit here in a proverbial pillar of salt.  While it was an interesting and reasonably good year on a personal level, I am sad and despondent over the state of our nation. As much as I would like to be positive and say that 2017 is going to be a banner year, it is far more likely to become a shit-storm. That me for me it is a time for introversion and building. My book will be finished. I will be working more with homeschoolers and maybe less in the arts... unless those two things combine. I will make a decision about my Masters degree.. will I get one or not? I hope I can find some joy this year.. as I have a wonderful family and am well cared for, but what good is my comfort if others are being persecuted? Goodbye 2016.  I will spend the next few days putting on my armor for the coming years.

A week ago I had the opportunity to sit with a young man and have a meaningful conversation.  I will start by saying that I am glad to not be young in this day and age. The loss of privacy between this generation and mine is astounding. The social media causes one to either be completely antisocial or more visible than they are comfortable with. If I had to deal with that in my early 20's and try to maintain a relationship, I never would have made it. We talked about how I had a long-distance relationship (with my now husband) throughout college.  He was astounded that we had a phone date once a week where we spoke for an hour. That it all. The bill cost too much for anything more, although we did have an occasional 5 minute quickie conversation, we really only spoke once a week... for 4 years... and saw each other on major holidays. When we compared this to how the young people's conversations work, with daily and sometimes hourly texting, he asked me to draw a comparison...

I'm not going to go into it. Matthew 6:4-6 says "Give your gifts in private, and your Father, who sees everything, will reward you." So only a handful people will know the details... the person I had to get permission from to spend above the pre-set amt, the 2 women I tell my secrets to, and my children who notice everything I do... but the short and short of it is I was moody.  I knew someone had a need, and I took care of it. HELLO CHRISTMAS SPIRIT. For today anyway.  So that's the answer... think less about me and my moods and my ... depression... and think more about others and the mood will lift.  Good news. Good news. So if you are one of those people for whom this holiday season brings you more down than up, find someone who is in need and help them... they are not too hard to find.  Just ask a couple of friends, or call a church or something. I know I didn't have to look far. ps... I hope no one thinks I am bragging... I just really, really wa...

Well.. actually, I've never been real big on Christmas.  I decided it was anticlimactic around the age of 11. My older brother used to wake everyone up at 3am to open gifts when we'd rather be sleeping and then we would go back to bed.  I never felt the warm fuzzies about that exercise...  I preferred the Christmas Mass at the church instead.  That's just me. So I have been the producer of the Christmas show at the community theatre this year, and while it was fun and Christmassy, it occupied my thoughts in a way that was not very 'holiday'.. more business instead.  So that it over now, and I like 1 week before Christmas... OK... wow! We have gifts that I need to wrap (put in store bought pre-decorated boxes) and I guess maybe we should start making cookies or something. I wonder if anyone is having a party.  That might put me in the mood... or at least A mood.

I edited an essay for a college bound student the other day.  I found the essay intriguing because it was quite and artistic way of saying, I tend to procrastinate, but I am working on it. If I were the admissions officer, I would accept them. The essay started out describing time as the enemy. It pondered through the relativism of time and some philosophy regarding time and how we move through it. Interestingly enough, I have been feeling similar feelings... except more like that time has become a tractor trailer with failing brakes. My dad was a truck driver, so I am well aware of the struggle the truck has climbing the hill. It seems, slow, arduous, and painful, but it keeps chugging with that "I think I can attitude". As it climbs that hill (of life) it picks up experiences, and skills, and learns little tricks and tips to make the journey successful.... And then it reaches the top.  It puts its proverbial hands on its hips and surveys the surroundings.  It would...

I did math this evening.... for fun. I am brushing up my math skills to eventually get the nerve to go take college Algebra and maybe do some college-ing myself.  I figure working the old noggin will put of senility.  I was much sharper when we were homeschooling.  Why not homeschool myself? In the meantime, I started at arithmetic.  The photo shows how much I have done in two sittings.  An hour a month ago and two hours today. If I remember to keep at it, I should be through all the high school maths, or at least through Algebra in a month. I think this is a Free math program that parents should consider for their homeschooled kids. I've always loved this site, even back when it was just very quietly  spoken videos.  I loved it when it had a weird way of tracking progress, but now they've really got it together. While my kids hated videos, they would stop and use them if they got stuck, so this math program now offers the best of two worl...

I'm more excited about the boy's college graduation and the girls 3 weeks at home more than the actual holiday.  If I ever was a scrooge before, I am certainly feeling it now. I just paid college tuition for the last time... for my daughter... for the school she is in. We are waiting to hear from my son's college re his grad school application, so there's money.... and girl wants grad school eventually, and I'm sure that's gonna cost us something... sooo... Anyway, I can't wait for my daughter to get home so we can hang out and sew stuff and have inappropriate conversations... cuz that's what we do.  She's just growing up so fast that I find it both depressing and exciting.  She even had her first doctors appointment without me this week... she felt like garbage and did not ask me to drive 2 hours each way to accompany her to the doctor.  If course I had to reimburse her for the copay (yikes) and the prescription (double yikes) but she was well e...

So, I changed my blog title.  It was coming for some time.  My youngest homeschooler graduates from college in May and my oldest just applied for Grad school... and while I am still somewhat involved and give advice to homeschoolers (and am almost done with my book), my most passionate posts as of late have been about me and dealing with this world.  Check out my Anger and loathing series and you will see what I mean. I am constantly having moments. I am short tempered.  It gets real hot at the most inopportune times and my under-boob skin is dry and sensitive.  I've spent my whole life being a "natural beauty" with the exception of some awkward teen years, and now My bathroom is bursting with potions and bottles.  Lord, Help Me!! So this is where I am at. Enjoy the ride.

I got a text of Facebook messenger on Sunday, when I was on the way to eat with my family.  Here are are some tidbits. The note started saying that I posted a story where two people defended two Chinese women who were being racially attached on a train... The story said that this we part of the Trump Effect. I believe it is.   Personally, I would rather be approached publicly where I can defend myself publicly than under the "I love you" guise of friendship... we last talked 2 years ago.  I'm like... uh... no... I'm pretty sure Jesus ruffled some feathers by not falling in line with leadership.  Otherwise they wouldn't have hung him.  I don't have to respect "leaders who ever they be"... I just need to pay my taxes.  And this is where they lost me.  For real.  I started spitting and cursing and my son threatened to take my phone and delete the Facebook messenger app!  I don't care how you feel about Obama... really, I don...

Welp.  I am still not happy and don't know when I will be again. Is that depression? Is that anger? Is that denial? Am I having a hissy fit? Maybe one, maybe some, maybe all. I don't know about you all, but I can clearly see how things will go wrong. We are not dealing in reality and it seems most people don't have the the willingness or ability to see it.  I don't mean to insult, as I have friends who actually want the reality we live in, but my sensing leaves me in a foreboding mood. A friend told me that he doesn't understand how warm and engaging I am in person because it contradicts with my frank, stern nature online.  I think I am a teddy bear all the time, or at least I want to be, but now really isn't a good time to be a teddy bear is it... and he had only known me for a year, so he missed out on a lot. Anyway I am rambling! Two college graduations are getting sooner and sooner... so for us, at least homeschooling works. I think a lot m...