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Tuesday, October 09, 2012

5 Homeschooling battles I stopped fighting

Lydia from Rants from Mommy Land wrote an article on 5 stupid battles she stopped fighting.  It is spot on.  Read it.

I loved it so much I am going to copy her a bit... This is sincere flattery.  So, here are the homeschooling battles that I have stopped fighting.
  1.  Curriculum comparison:  Unless I see that you have a curriculum that I have been thinking about, I probably won't talk to you about it.  Unless, you ask about my curriculum, I also won't talk to you about it.  ... And even then, I will keep the conversations to a bare minimum.  I have seen too many curriculum discussions come close to fisticuffs or at the least, leaving an insecure or newbie homeschooling mother in tears.  It's not that important.  Just pick something and use it.

2.  Defending homeschooling: I don't care what my neighbors think, what my friends think, what my parents think, what my siblings think, what my in-laws think, and most importantly what strangers think.  I am not going to have any more of THOSE conversations trying to convince someone that I am doing the right thing by homeschooling.  I will encourage homeschooling for people who are looking
into it, but I am a grown woman and don't need to answer to anyone as to how I am raising my kids, and those people who are all up in my business.... They're just going to have to deal with it.

3.  A pristine home:  It is not going to happen.  You can't have people in the home 24 hours 7 days a week and have it look like a model home.  I've tried cleaning obsessively.  I've tried having a cleaning service.  I've tried bribery and threats.  Now I'm just waiting them out.  The youngest goes to college next year.  My house will be clean again.

4.  Teaching Teenagers an actual lesson: Once they hit middle school and decide that mom is a flaming idiot, having them sit through a lesson as you read the book and try to impart knowledge to them is not going to work... especially when they can read the same book themselves.  It is more likely that you are just slowing them down anyway.  I did manage to "teach" them American History for two months because I wanted to add more information on slavery and the Civil war to the curriculum and do it in a way that would guard them emotionally. (I had to explain this to them to get buy-in). But as soon as those units were done, I was summarily excused and sent on my way.   It is far better to teach a love for learning and help them to teach themselves before they are 13.

5. Scheduling:  It amazes my how some homeschooling parents have a full day, week, and month's schedule planned out to the minute, including lunch and snack times.  I tried that once and it made me and the kids CRAZY.   Sometimes subjects just take longer, sometimes they take no time at all, and sometimes they need to spend 45 minutes in the bathroom. So instead of planning out our days, I give a rough beginning and ending time, and a checklist of what needs to be done.  I'm much more relaxed that way, and they still feel a level of accountability.



My name is Tiffany said...

I am going to check out the post your recommended. But how do you teach a love of learning. Please do tell. I want to impart that on my boys so that when they are older my role will be more of a mentor less me stiring the ship if that makes sense. Currently I struggle within myself, my seven year old has his own interest but I have a hard time pursuing those when this years curriculum is already purchased and there is no money for something else. sigh But I feel like my "way" method is killing his love of learning.

Ahermitt said...

Hi Tiffany, I will give this serious thought and write a blog post. Thanks for commenting.

Karen said...

Andrea, LOVE LOVE LOVE this blog post!!!!!! I can so understand the teaching teen thing...LOL.
I hope you don't mind, but I wrote a blog post, inspired by yours!
You can find it at:

Thanks for your post!
Peace, Karen

Denise said...

Karen introduced your blog to me this morning. Love it. My thoughts exactly. My daughter is 8 and is dyslexic and I can't wait until we get to the point where she can be more independent in her learning. She is stubborn, just like me, so I know we both will be a little happier. Thanks for your Blog!