I have a horrible fixation with having the first appointment of the morning. I hate the idea of being behind whatever could possibly go wrong during the day. A previous appointment who is late. The doctor (or whoever the appointment is with) having a bad sandwich... whatever could affect the course of one's day.... I don't want it to affect mine. So if the mammogram office tells me that there is a 7:30 AM appointment, I am taking it.
Yes. I am crazy.
First, I didn't sleep well not wanting to miss my appointment and worried that I would not wake up with the 6am alarm (as I had to be there at 7) so I was cranky and tired. Second, It was for a mammogram, so I had high anxiety. Third, I hadn't had a mammogram in 4 years because the hospital messed up my bill the last time, and it took 3 years to straighten it out, I didn't want to deal with them again. Also, they scared me to death and inconvenienced me thinking something was wrong for the doctor to decide it was nothing. Oh, I almost caused a car accident on the way... did I say anxiety?
So the first person I deal with is the account person. She doesn't want to be up at that hour either.... and if I remember correctly, she is the same person who did my billing last time. I ask to pay my copay right away, and in a very nasty tone she says she can't because she does not know how much my insurance will cover or not (every other doctor can estimate this though). I tell her why, because of the problem with the last time, and she gets offensive, and says "I don't know what you are talking about. That did not happen." So, I'm like whatever, she's like whatever, so whatever. She walked me to the back and gave me brief instructions, nothing like the gentle instructions I heard her give every other person so... forget her. Unlike last time, I was not instructed that I could have a refreshment, nothing... she spoke to me like I was a dog. I wanted to cut her, but I did not. She lived.
Thank goodness, the technician was wonderful. She played a weird game of twister with my body, but she was encouraging and pleasant.... and handsy... but that was her job. Unlike the last time, halfway through, she did not fall silent and break eye contact. I did not leave with more anxiety. Whether I have to go back again for more tests like last time, I am not worried about it... so, good. That is over, at least for now.
The best thing about that appointment is I was back home by 8:30.... and I took a mid-day nap.
Next time, OBGYN.