Speechless and dragging

That is how I feel lately.

I am speechless and I feel like while I have a ton to say, the words are caught in my throat.  I feel like I have to choose between speaking and breathing. I feel like my throat is so constricted from worry that it can only serve one function at a time... well, maybe two, cuz there's eating.  But at first, I couldn't even eat.  All I could do was breathe, barely. I felt myself grasping onto a proverbial banister or chair rail, panting with heaving chest and laboring back just to exist from one moment to another.  Being so focused on just living, breathing from day to day, left my mind crowed with words that can't seem to get out.  My brain is full... and the images are not cute or fuzzy.

Basically. I'm pissed and don't know how to express it.  Who am I mad at?  The world. Everything and nothing.

And now I am dragging.  Perhaps I have been breathing too shallow for so long that the oxygen is no longer making it to my extremities. Is that why my feet tingle? Is that why my arms grow numb? Could my mental and emotional upset be contributing to my physical malaise?  Or could that flu I had about six weeks ago have left me with some kind of invisible secondary infection that won't go away.

Either way, I am literally, sick and tired, and speechless. I do have a doctor's appointment soon... maybe I should also get a therapist.  ((shrug)).

Anniversary, Puerto Rico, Education, and Zika

No I don't have Zika... I don't think.  But according to the signs I passed at the airport, on my way out, I very well could and not know it.

Had I known about the possibility of Zika in Puerto Rico, I would have used more bug repellant while I was there, even though I am allergic to Deet.  Now I am using repellant to prevent getting bit at home so I am not personally responsible for brining Zika to GA and beyond. 

Other than that, celebrating my 25th wedding anniversary on a tropical island was fun. And pretty.  See. 

If you look, city is pretty apparent through the facade of resort. And if you know anything about Puerto Rico, things aren't going well for the people who live there. 

Much like New Orleans, Puerto Rico relies on tourism, but it is not pulling the numbers to keep it afloat. The US Territory is currently in the midst of bankruptcy.  (The US should be paying closer attention because this can happen to us). 

For years, Puerto Rico borrowed money by issuing municipal bonds, using the funds to compensate for declining government revenue and prevent deep cuts in services and layoffs of public workers. It easily found investors. ~ https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/business/dealbook/puerto-rico-debt-crisis-explained.html

The results is medical facilities and schools are closing. SCHOOLS ARE CLOSING.  Those locals who can, are leaving. The poor will be left destitute and in a 3rd World situation, if the US doesn't step in, and I doubt they will. We clearly get to take the resources and give nothing back.  As of today, it was announced, that more than 300 Puerto Rico schools will be closed by August. For reals. 

Parents are panicked! But us homeschooled mamas are like... hey... Yall need some curriculum?  The rules there are oppressive, but since they are closing actually schools, do they really care?  Won't they just rubberstamp the private school applications? 

I'm sitting over here trying to figure out how to bring homeschooling en-mass to the island without contacting Zika... I'm kinda serious.  Live on the beach... run a homeschool co-op.  Lean Spanish.  yeah. 

Problems with Frontier

If you've kept up with my sporadic blog, you know I spend a good year commuting to and from NYC, where my husband was working.  I tried several different types of transportation, as all that travel gets expensive.

I ended up using Frontier, for most of my travel as if I traveled in advance it was dirt cheap... but dirt cheap is well... dirty and cheap. Like that time I took the China bus and spend several hours locked in a frantic gaze with a cockroach.

So anyway, here are the problems I have had, the last one, I am currently still having.

1. Dirty...  The airplane itself could be cleaner.... but when flights are dirt cheap, you are dealing with a population that gives a pass on that, so between the effort to clean and the fact that everyone is getting on with enough food to last on a 3 month Trek to Alaska, then nastiness will happen. Frontier is the MegaBus of the air.

2. A-la-cart.  Sure, you can fly to NYC and back for $$60.00, but that's just for you, your luggage will have to pay extra.  Fortunately for my, I had a closet in NYC, so I carried, my computer, and a few personal items in a backpack that I was not charged for.

3. First class?  My A$$. I paid for first class a few times, usually because when I arrived at the gate, everyone was coughing and hacking (middle of the winter) and my OCD self nearly had a melt down.  First class puts you in the front of the airline, so you're not in the middle of all the germs... that it all...  There are still middle seats.  Extra leg room is barely perceptible.

4. Dark corners, and barren lands. To get to the discount airlines at any airport (Frontier, Spirit, etc) you have to trek to the farthest, darkest corner of the airport.  It is faarrr. You walk a little, you take the air train, Then you walk another mile or two... yes, you end up running.  I have bad knees.  This was not fun.

5. Membership fees/scams: Yes, I said it.  In order to get the best prices, you had to sign up for membership.  $50 a year.  Not a problem because I had a regular commute, but when I got tired of this airline, plus could never log in, because their systems are crap, I called and cancelled.  I was just organizing my papers, and looked through my credit card bills for the year (tax time) and saw that I was charged membership AFTER I cancelled.  I ended up on a conference call with them and my credit card carrier in which they said they had no record of my cancelling and that I had take too long to dispute the charge... Now I have to do paperwork with my credit card company to get my money back.

Do I think you should perhaps not use Frontier?  Shrug... that's up to you... just know what you are dealing with.

Whew, that was a lot of work!

I ended up spending the winter costuming a big middle school musical, and a small community theatre show.  And I got the flu and was sick for 10 days.  I can't really post a because of age and permissions.  Here's a blurry one with bad resolution!